With your last Spirit Week coming up, you’ve probably already thought about your various outfits. But for a little bit more inspiration, see below. It’s your last year – give it your all.[Monday] Theme day – ’90s: Most seniors tend to take one of two popular routes: either rollerblading around the Quad or carrying a boombox around school. Why not try both? Seniors, it is time to start paying for those rollerblading lessons ASAP. Although we would enjoy seeing a few of you face-plant on the Quad, we will also pity you, so here are our words of advice. And since boomboxes typically weigh around 30 pounds, it’s time to hit the gym. We expect to be seeing at least half of the seniors at our next YMCA visit. Better start on your lifelong dream to become a rollerblader with the most fly tunes.
[Tuesday] Dressing day – Caesar: For toga tips, see here. Use extra safety pins for your toga because we really don’t want to see any slips. Ride in eating grapes on your chariot with a little bit of “wine,” aka grape juice. Fight in the colosseum wearing your gladiator sandals, and take a break by playing a soothing harp song.
[Wednesday] Color day – Green: Go all out and get your green from Target, Goodwill or Spirit. You’ve done this before so we expect only the best.
[Thursday] Generation day – Senior Citizens: You’re officially over 70 and you’re old enough to get the Happy Meal for less than $5. Congratulations! Grab your cane, wheelchair or scooter and take your time getting to class. Being an old senior citizen is a wonderful excuse to be late. We want to see every senior have at least five pillows attached to their stomach and rear end, and when seniors smile, there better be excess lipstick on their teeth. We don’t want to see any brunettes, blondes or redheads on this day – there’d better be gray hair everywhere. You’re most officially the oldest in the school, so don’t forget to yell at those “dirty rotten kids” to “get off my lawn.”
[Friday] Camo: You know what to do. Last day, make it count.